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Whipped Cream, Now With 15% More Alcohol!

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NOW THIS IS HAPPENING
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“Whipped cream’s not just for kids anymore, it’s all about style and sophistication,” Whipped Lightning’s website declares. Some college students seem to have internalized the alcohol-infused whipped cream’s aspirational message. "You can throw it on some Jell-O shots. It'd be fantastic," University of Central Florida’s Bo Frisby told WFTV.com. The site reports that sales of the novelty treat in Florida are brisk.

“Whipahol” is for the moment lolling in a market of two brands: Cream and Whipped Lightning.

Whipped Lightning is 36 proof and comes in adult-oriented flavors like cherry, orange and raspberry. Cream is 30 proof and offers German chocolate, hazelnut espresso, amaretto and coconut among its temptations. Both are infused with grain alcohol and serve about 26 1-oz. shots per can.

Unlike whipped cream, Whipahol can last up to a year and mustn’t be refrigerated. Unlike grain alcohol, Whipahol won’t provide a testament to the fundamental hardiness of the esophageal wall. United by nitrous, they make a prurient punch line and possibly a U.S. Food and Drug Administration recall-in-waiting. Hilarity ensues.

"I mean if people already get high off whipped cream bottles, you put alcohol into that mix, it's not exactly a good combination," UCF student Lisette Diaz reportedly said. "Even regular whipped cream is something people don't use in moderation.”

Now that Diaz has spilled the beans, can the FDA be far behind? The agency already “warned” four alcoholic drink makers earlier this month that their products contained an “unsafe food additive” whose dangers would no longer be brooked by the marketplace. The additive in question is an unstable chemical compound called caffeinated alcohol.

"There is evidence that the combinations of caffeine and alcohol in these products pose a public health concern,” the FDA said. The caffeine in these drinks artfully leads the unsuspecting to believe they have a wooden leg, the agency posits.

The FDA is late to the party. Several students were hospitalized after drinking AEDs, and at least six universities have banned the sale of the drinks on campus. Dozens more have sent cautionary letters about the drinks to students, and Oregon, Pennsylvania, Washington and New York are among the states taking steps to remove it from shelves.

The kerfuffle over AEDs isn’t new. Fruit-flavored energy beers Tilt, Sparks and Bud Extra agreed in 2008 under pressure from states attorneys to remove the caffeine from their drinks.
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