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Feeling Less Rich Lately? It's Because You Are

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THE RICH
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You know, lately we haven't been in the mood to do much shopping. It just hasn't felt right. Also, we don't have any money. Which can obviously be a problem. But hey, it's not like that's ever stopped us before! So what's the deal? Why do we feel so much poorer now than we used -- apart from the fact we are, I mean? It can't be the actual numbers that show we're poorer because, as a society, over time we have demonstrably shown time and time again that... no money? So what?

Ho ho, but I exaggerate. It's not that we're poorer, it's just that we're less wealthy. What does that mean?

Take a look at this chart from Bloomberg, which shows actual vs. projected wealth from 1980 to present, drawn out at a 7.7% average annual increase, which is a ridiculous out-of-thin-air projection anyway, but we're not going to talk about that right now because the story line - a $28.6 trillion 'wealth gap' - is just so damn good.



See that? The gap, which is the difference between the red line -- or as I like to refer to it, my grip -- and the blue mountain thing -- which I call the sad hills of moneyless longing -- is a stunning $28.6 trillion dollars. 

This perhaps explains why whenever someone mentions an iPad in my presence I point out that I had one 30 years ago -- and it's basically just an abacus, a Lite Brite and a Shrkinky Dinks kit all mixed together, and you know what? I hated Lite Brite. Now, my feelings on this simply may be due to the horrific Lite Brite accident I suffered as a kid. What happened was when I was about five years old or so, I was lying on my back in front of the TV watching Zoom and playing with my Lite Brite pegs. It was fun! I would take a Lite Brite peg, place it gently on one nostril, hold the other side with my finger and blow out hard, launching the Lite Brite peg far into space. It was my little Lite Brite peg space rocket. Unfortunately, there was a very serious Lite Brite rocket launching accident. What happened was I put the Lite Brite peg rocket into place, held the other nostril as usual, but failed to inhale first, so when I breathed in the Lite Brite peg space rocket, well, it became lodged. I was almost able to retrieve it, but just missed, lodging it even deeper into my nose. Next thing I know I'm in the emergency room while Dr. Shaky Whiskey Hands is using some kind of forceps-like device to remove the Lite Brite peg from my nose. Needless to say, I am no fan of the iPad!

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