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Cereal Mascot Mashup: A Horror of Your Complete Breakfast

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Who is the most beloved character from your fun-filled cereal adventures? The benevolent guide, Toucan Sam? Maybe the stern but sympathetic Cap'n Crunch? How about the simulacrum of greed and frenetic id that is the Trix Rabbit?

Whomever your favorite, companies like General Mills, Post, and Kellogg spend an enormous amount of time, effort, and funds developing a special bond between animated cereal mascots and prepubescent children. While adults might see a marshmallow-chomping demon of moonlit moors, kids see the beloved snaggle-toothed vampire of Count Chocula cereal.

But however delightful they are on their own, Jon Adams of the comic blog City Cyclops created an amalgamation of 16 different cereal mascots that would horrify both the innocent and emotionally mature. To concoct such a mashup of animated limbs and beaks, a technicolor monstrosity, is to be the doorman of the gateway to unceasing madness and dread. A veritable Josef Mengele of your breakfast table.

Behold! The manifestation of all that is evil and enriched with roboflavin from the kid-friendly version of the Necronomicon.

The indictment against blatant and manipulative commercialism may suit the fancy of an ironic T-shirt manufacturer, but the statement is lost once this hideous mutation utters his infamous Saturday morning catchphrase:

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