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Apparently, News of BP Spill Never Made It to Abu Dhabi

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NOW THIS IS HAPPENING
DailyFeed
The Abu Dhabi Investment Authority is reportedly in talks with ex-BP CEO Tony Hayward so he can ruin the emirate's sovereign wealth fund next.

According to reports, representatives from the fund have approached Hayward to to set up a new oil company. Yes, the very man who bungled BP's response to the Deepwater Horizon blowout so badly, he was run out of town on a rail, . A very plush, well-appointed rail, but a rail nonetheless.



Has no one heard of Tony Hayward? Do they not have television in Abu Dhabi? No, no--of course they do:

There's "Charlie's Fully-Veiled Angels":



"Creepy South Park-ish Cartoons With Big Surprised Eyes, Lorded Over by a Scary Guy in a Robe":



And, of course, "Rachael Ray":



She's everywhere these days!

Of course, Abu Dhabi also has so much oil, perhaps it's the only place in the world that has enough of a surplus to withstand as many "mishaps" as Tony can dish out. And they do have plenty of sand with which to absorb it.
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