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Airline to Charge for Human Interactions

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Ladies and gentlemen, it’s officially 1984…well, actually 2010, but by 1984 I mean an era really far in the future when…well, you get the point.

Spirit Airlines is considering a new fee that would charge passengers if they want to interact with a “human” agent at the airport rather than using an electronic kiosk.

""When talking to a human being becomes an option, rather than a necessity, then we're willing to charge for it," Spirit CEO Ben Baldanza told ABC News.

"When there's a way for customers to do it themselves electronically, at that point, we could consider charging a few dollars to interact with a human...But if the only way we can do the transaction for you is to talk to a human, we're not going to charge you for that."

Okay. Is it me or is there something horribly cold about how Baldanza even talks about all this?  Note, it’s not “people,” or “agents,” or “Sprit employees.”  It’s “humans.”  Like, you  know, those carbon-based organic entities in phylum Chordata, Class Mammalia, Order Primates, etc. etc. etc…

Anyway, Spirit already charges its passengers for carry-on luggage, assigned seats, and even soda, so a new fee to interact with fellow homo sapiens shouldn’t be a shock to anyone.

But just because Baldanza comes off entirely divorced from his human brethren doesn’t mean he’s not without a shred of humanity.

There is one thing he insists Sprit will not charge for.

"We would not consider charging for bathrooms…"When you have to go, you have to go."

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