You know you've been waiting for decades to sip a Moscato called "You Shook Me All Night Long."
Now you know: Greenland is as boring as it sounds.
Local businesses advertise, albeit on the cheap, that they've got the forbidden fruit.
If all goes according to Danish pharma H. Lundbeck's plan, users could trade alcohol addiction for drug addiction.
When you can't even think of moving, let someone else do the work.
Doctors have already voiced the benefits of moderate drinking. Now they can start directing you to the nearest kegger.
The T-shirts bearing gun-toting American eagles are right: Any state that creates this, you shouldn't mess with.