In 1994, computer users grew drunk with power upon the invention of the Universal Serial Bus, or USB. By powering peripherals with no need to reboot, USB quickly spawned a wide variety of useful tools for a better user experience. External hard drives, digital cameras, and game controllers became instantly recognized and ready to go in a matter of seconds -- provided Microsoft (MSFT) Windows had the drivers.

Nevertheless, the door had been opened and the future looked bright -- likely lit by a USB desk lamp.

And then a wave of wacky crap flooded the market. Focusing on the question "What if we could?" rather than "But should we?", companies introduced strange and tacky gadgets that could fill a thousand Spencer's Gifts locations.

Brightly colored plastic toys began hanging off the side of laptops and dangling from the back of desktops. Devices that could easily be plugged into the wall -- or even more easily run from batteries -- now could run off your already struggling computer processor.

But then again, how else are you going to keep your coffee mug heated if you don't have a warming cup rest that also plays Nelly's "Hot in Herre"?

Minyanville plugs into 10 USB devices that ought to fill its makers with a port full of shame.