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Dysfunctional Family Businesses: The Hogans

By Jordan Stein Jun 30, 2009 8:35 am
The Hulkster's family is body-slammed by reality-TV infamy.
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During his long and impressive wrestling career, Hulk Hogan drew hordes of fans (dubbed Hulkamaniacs) not just with his charisma and physical prowess, but with a blue-collar, everyman appeal (Vince McMahon gave him the clearly “Irish” name Hogan for this very reason). This was always on display on Hogan Knows Best, the Hulkster's heartwarming VH1 reality show.

But some recent ugliness, when juxtaposed with the Hogan’s picture-perfect onscreen life, lends credence to the notion that there’s nothing real about reality TV.

Hogan Knows Best was a way for Hogan to stay relevant - and promote his daughter Brooke’s burgeoning music career. Hulk was predictably overprotective of Brooke, which quickly became one of the show’s running themes. But her blonde hair and nubile form, coupled with his imposing stature, made it more of a self-fulfilling prophecy than a real concern

While shooting Hogan Knows Best in 2007, Hulk cheated on his wife of 24 years with one of Brooke’s friends. Fans and scores of yellow journalists expressed greater outrage over the age of Hulk’s mistress than the tryst itself. And that may be because of the widespread belief that, tryst or no, the marriage had been over for a while.

Hilton Hogan Family
(Hell hath no fury like a woman in a male-sized midlife crisis: Shortly thereafter, Linda herself began dating a 19-year-old.)

Things got worse from there. Much worse.

Seventeen-year-old Nick was sentenced to 8 months behind bars after a drunken street race in his old man’s 1998 Toyota Supra. The passenger was 22-year-old John Graziano, a friend and former Marine, who was left in a permanent vegetative state after the car hit a curb, spun out, and flew headlong into a palm tree.

Any remorse on the part of the family was cast in serious doubt when prison tapes of phone conversations between Nick and the Hulk were made public. Many of their discussions centered not on deep regret, but on how the fiasco could be spun for their own gain. At one point, the idea of a reality show -- which Hulk suggested they call The New Nick -- is floated. Nick tells his father he wants whatever vehicle will allow him to “make the most money.”

Hulk claimed on Larry King Live that the chatter was idle -- aimed only at calming his newly incarcerated and clearly shaken son -- but most aren’t buying it.

Today, Nick is out of jail and rumored to be living in California -- far from his bad memories of Florida, where the family once lived under one roof. Brooke has been given a spinoff reality show of her own -- with the uninspired title Brooke Knows Best -- that heavily promotes her music career. Linda is all but estranged from her ex-husband and children. She recently put out a press release attacking Brooke, taking her to task for her questionable talent and obvious breast augmentations.

As for Hulk, he has to be wondering if he would have been better off leaving the entertainment business when he left the ring.

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(9)
2009-07-09 12:41:08
Reality Wrestling
Is the same as Military Intelligence. So is Reality Show. I only read about them here online and watch The Soup on E. Can anyone tell me what the Hogans have done outside the realm of regullar family behavior in families both rich and poor? The discussion on how to spin the car accident is the fault of the public who have television into the biggest Roman Circus Arena since Nero. I hear weak minded airheads chatting about these shows like my mother used to talk to my aunts and Grandmother about what happened on the soap operas that day. Somehow I never got use to hearing bits and pieces about things like, >>"I bet she shot him..", "..Alcie is datin Richard's brother.." and having to remind myself: It's only a soap. It's only a soap. Honestly, the TV public today is like the old ladies who went to wrestling matches in the 60's and became hysterical at the show and would run up to the ring and pound and scream athe the referee for missing the fact ten men just hopped in the ring and beat up the good guy--and the ref didn't see. There are still dumb hicks who believe that "professional wrerstling" is real. You know, like Reality TV. By the way, is it true that John is leaving Kate for another man. OHMYGAWD!!!!
2009-07-09 12:51:05
Linda Hogan
I would love to see Linda Hogan make a temporary move to California to be near Nick. Not live with him but be the responsible adult in his life as he transitions to all that he needs to accomplish. He needs to get back to school and learn about computers or acting or whatever he wants to do. But get more education because you need to get your life back on track, legally. Stop being the bad boy. the good boy is appealing and strong, in good shape and generous to others in need. An image change is needed for Nick. However, Linda you need to pursue your own thing. Like Anthony Robbins use to love to say, "Find your passion and make it happen". Florida is only 7 hours by plane if you really need to go back from time-to-time. I bet you won't be in CA by yourself for long. In the meantime, you will create a new life journey for just you. You've earned it. And seriously, work on your hair color. Platinum blonde just ages you more than you would like.
2009-07-09 14:30:02
Hulk Hogan
When a man who cheats on his wife with another younger than she is, he is bound to feel the real and genuine anger of his wife. He deserves all that he got and then some. Wearing a cross doesn't make one a Christian anymore than going to church. Only if the Spirit of Christ lives in you by faith in the Son of God who gave His life can one know for certain that he can be forgiven and have the power to overcome any temptation (I Cor. 10:13). At the time his family needs him the most he is out of commission. I hope that Linda Hogan moves to California to be near Nick as a responsible (tongue in cheek)adult in his life. It is only the Spirit of Christ that can give one self control of one's mind, heart, soul, and body.
2009-07-09 14:34:59
Reality Wrestling
Good comparisons and analysis from your childhood.
2009-07-09 14:36:34
Linda Hogan
I like your advice to Linda Hogan to help her son and herself.
2009-07-09 14:44:07
dumb linda
hulk made a mistake we are all human, linda looks like an idot, crying for her family saying she is all alone. dumb girl no one said leave hulk she made her grave with charlie so lay in it if she wants charlie she will have to live with brook hating her. to me she is the bad person in this not hulk.
2009-07-24 21:09:03
Dysfunctional Family Business: The Hogans
First of all, Mr. Stein, Mr. Hogan DID NOT cheat on his wife! They grew estranged do to Linda Hogan compulsively spending alot of there finances. Hogan got tired of it and removed all finances into a account she could not touch. As far as him seeing someone, he did not start seeing someone else(the age of 37)until Linda started dating Brooke's highschool classmate!(The ripe old age of 19!)Second,Nick was never drunk or even had any alcohol in his system when he wrecked. He was drag racing w/ his friend as a passenger when the wreck happened. If anybody should be looked at in that fam. it should be Linda. Accusing Brooke,her boyfriend, and Hogan of smoking pot in their recording studio. All took tests,and were deamed negative on all counts! She then wonders why everyone thinks shes "The Bad Guy"! and her own daughter doesn't want anything to do w/ her! Get your facts straight before you print your story.
2009-07-25 09:57:02
The Hogans
Here is my .02 Hulk i feel sorry for that guy wrestles all his life makes his fortune and now can't even live in the house that he paid for because of that B@#$ ex wife linda and her restraning order , Nick got off easy with nine months in jail should have been nine years that's celeb treatment for ya had you or i practically killed someone, judge would have thrown the book at us and ahhh yes poor brooke living high on the hog in a multi million dollar miami condo peddling her music career and saving the family heirarchy
2009-07-25 13:47:15
Hogan! Auchtung! this is commandant Klink speaking. I told you Hogan you'd never get away with it.
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